The Fourteenth Ray
I say this to Afyon Court:
As is said in my statement, which has been presented to you and been put before the law and its justice: to raid my house three times illegally, summon me for questioning, and arrest me has violated the dignity of three high courts and cast aspersions on their justice, indeed insulted it. For three courts and three ‘committees of experts’ have scrutinized closely over two years my books and letters of twenty years, and both we have been acquitted, and our books and letters returned. Moreover, living in complete seclusion under the most rigorous surveillance for three years after having been acquitted, I was able to write only one harmless letter a week to some of my friends. It was as though all my relations with the world had been cut, for although I had been given my freedom, I could not return to my native region. It tramples the honour of those three courts to bring up the same question again now, as though completely disregarding their just decisions. I make a plea to your court to preserve the honour of those courts, which acted justly towards me. You should find some matter with which to blame me other than “the Risale-i Nur,” “organizing a political society,” “founding a sufi order,” and “the possibility of breaching security and disturbing public order,” for they constitute the same case! I have many faults. I have decided to help you concerning my blameworthiness, for I have suffered far more outside prison than inside it. I would find more comfort now in either the grave or prison. Truly I am fed up with life. Enough now of these twenty years of torment in solitary confinement, intolerable surveillance and humiliation. It will